let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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