therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
