I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
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