Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
