i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I checked into jail on foursquare
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
