hell yes lets make some ravioli
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize