I murdered the dance floor call the cops
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
She bit a glass in half.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Come on in and take your pants off
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