I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
