That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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