Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
