girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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