Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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