okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
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After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
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Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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