We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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