He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
try to milk me bitch
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
