Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I just threw up on my dentist
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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