FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
