Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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