im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize