Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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