no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize