I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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