Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
