Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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