69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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