She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
