what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
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It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
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We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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