You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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