Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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