Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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