Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
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