I want to walk on stilts...naked
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
