There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
