U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
