Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Randomize
