I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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