There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Randomize