There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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