I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize