jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
We left the knife in your bed.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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