i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize