I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
