i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
