I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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