This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
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We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
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He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I wear drunk well.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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