Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
