tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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