haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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