Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
