Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize