Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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